Electric Stoves are Stupid

I'm not sure who or why anyone ever invented stupid electric stoves-they stink. Let me just tell you a few of the reasons why they really are a waste of stupid space....(I have had several in the many, many, many houses we have lived in so I am therefore the authority) First of all the way the knobs that turn on the burners could not have been situated with anyone with a brain-anyone sane would put them so I quit turning the wrong burner on-and further more what good do they do? It takes thirty minuets to heat up and then even worse longer to cool down so if you are boiling something over( I wouldn't do that because I am as good as Martha Stewart) but if on chance that you did, you have to physically remove the pan from the stove or else it continues to boil over. My mom always told me to wipe it up right away and it would come off easier-but that doesn't really work when it will scald the crap out of you to do that. Now that I have been ranting and raving-let me really top this story off=while I was doing said ranting and raving the grease I was trying to heat up to fry myself a taco-which by the way is a whole other story-catches on fire and there are flames and I mean flames shooting out of my pan. I happen to also be on the phone at this time and thinking that flames were too large to want to get very close to put the rather smallish lid on the pan-i put a cookie sheet over the whole kit and caboodle. Good thinking huh? Not really the cookie sheet wouldn't seal it so it didn't put out the fire! Now I have flames coming around the cookie sheet and my very brave and heroic sister and brother in law say put salt on it. "Good" I think, I've heard that before. Just for the record not for the weak of heart to attack a fire with a canister of salt. Needless to say as I am still here typing-I got the fire out ( with the salt) moved the smoking pans to the porch-hoping they don't reignite and catch my porch on fire and now have most the windows and two of the doors open trying to get the nasty smell out-the worst part? I still would really really like a taco.